What Scares Me – Part 2

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Every day I like to do something that scares me.

Choosing faith over fear, I went to work at a friends firm in Austin.

It scares me.

I’m scared in a good way.

Praying all day I can stay razor-sharp and accomplish as much as I can for our clients.

I am not commuting or working alone.

You have not to do it in your unaided strength: it is God who is all the while supplying the impulse, giving you the power to resolve, the strength to perform, the execution of His good pleasure. Philippians 2:13

In a nut shell my work encompasses being a tenacious problem-solver for each person I meet throughout my day and doing it with excellence.

The Office

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What Scares me…

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My empty light blinks on. Pulling off the interstate as  my  two-year old daughter sings,  a  gas station is nowhere to be seen.

A rickety metal Sinclair sign  sends me 3 miles down a rutted back road in southern Indiana.

A deserted  gas station greets me as the car rolls over tall grass growing up between concrete cracks.

Gas pumped a twenty to pay and child on my hip,  two red necks approach swiftly, the smell of unkempt bodies and beer knocks my senses and a small brass bell rings as my back pushes open the dusty glass door.

Hank Williams sings from where I hope a cashier is waiting to save me, but no, the barely stocked store is  hauntingly empty.

God spoke to my spirit warning me and nudging me to pull over sooner, but I ignored His signals and the lowering gas gauge.

The odor sickens me as they  paw me and  desperation hit to think they were about to touch my daughter.

The garage door swings open and a gritty oil covered man reaches out toward me.

The Lord is an ever-present helper even when we ignore His promptings.

The two men seemed to vanish like rats into a rusty blue Camaro with a confederate flag covering the back window.

He had been under a car in the bay and was so sorry. “How can I help you Ma’am?”

For He will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways. Psalm 91:11

Healing – Part 10

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Go to Church

Find a bible-based church that’s not so large you get lost in the shuffle.

“See and be radiant and your heart will tremble and rejoice.”  (first half of Is. 59v.5)

Experience the transformative power of God’s Word.

Sorrow is better than laugher, for sadness has a refining influence on us.

Ecclesiastes 7:3

Just soak it all in.

Rest.

Worship.009

Teaching.

The old.

The young.

Cry.

Church is a safe place to weep.

The deeper the sorrow, the less the tongue has to say.

The Talmud

Healing – Part 9

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Poetry

Pumpkins Rebecca Price Photography

Evening Pumpkins
by Rebecca Price

Spend time reading poems, writing poems and sharing poems with others.

The following poem is the favorite of Betty Flamm, the wise and beloved matriarch of our book club.

Betty’s godly presence guides, influences and brings us all up to a higher state of thought.

Mellowness

I like Spring, but it is too young.

I like Summer, but it is too proud.

So I like best of all Autumn;

Because its leaves are a little yellow,

Its tone mellover,

Its colors richer,

And it is tinged a little with sorrow.

Its golden richness speaks

Not of the innocence of spring,

Nor of the power of Summer,

But of the mellowness and kindly wisdom

Of approaching age,

It knows the limitations of life,

And is content.

-Lin Yutang

Take a dip at http://www.tweetspeakpoetry.com/blog-3/

A poem every day http://www.tweetspeakpoetry.com/every-day

Healing – Part 8

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Develop relationships with people in their 90’s.

They have walked through great and irreparable loss.

A seasoned perspective.

My Aunt Virginia almost 94, and a friend Frances, who is  94 seem to have a quick way of pulling me to a feeling of ease.

A beautiful sheath of lilies unfolds in my mind and the scent wakes me, when encouragement or advice comes from these women of distinction .IMG_1005

Show respect to the aged; honor the presence of an elder; fear your God.

I am God.

Leviticus 19:32 The Message

Healing – Part 7

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A well dressed gentlemen walked past me in the library.

His perfectly polished cordovan dress shoes were in contrast to a strong alcohol odor passing by and nauseating me.

Liquor seeped out of his skin on a Sunday afternoon.

I was just relaxing catching up on the latest periodicals, but another story began to unfold in my mind.

Sadness so unbearable some turn to old vices.

My old vice was candy, especially black licorice.

Blue after visiting with a grieving dear friend, I bought a box.

A strange calm arrived as I bite into the chewy, salty, tart sweet.

Perhaps this well-groomed young man had suffered a loss of some kind.

When the dark angst hits go outside and read the psalms beginning at 100.

Read out loud till you hit 107 verse 20.SONY DSC

He saved them from their distress.

He sent His word and healed them;

He rescued them from the Pit.    Psalm 107 v. 20 HCSB

 

 

Healing – Part 6

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The dove is missing!

For two days it bounce around my backyard without flying.

I fed it corn,  left water for it, and set up a hay bale to offer shade and protection from my door.

And now it is gone.

My hope became horror after I saw the feathers…lots of feathers, signs of a struggle.

Later while walking our small dog, fecal evidence betrayed our toy predator.

Our Shitzu was more Sun Tzu, a warrior bird dog, not a palace pet.

Mourn, rest, stay away from the kind of chaos that can attack us when we are in a vulnerable state.

 

 

Healing – Part 5

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In line at the grocery store a young mom started setting items aside she could not pay for–

bananas, apples, and other veggies.  I handed the money to the cashier and she, with her many lovely long braids, and her sweet children were on their way.

I’ll never see this family again, but I assured her it was from God and He loves her.

Standing in line at the gas station one of our coaches from the high school was checking out.  It was less than $10.00 but it gave me the opportunity to thank him for all he does for the young people in our community and a simple God Bless you.

You are reading this and thinking I don’t have any extra.

Save a quarter a week till you have a dollar and give it away and bless another.

Perhaps one of my biggest adjustments to having an empty nest is the grocery store, mine is HEB.  Feeling blue grocery shopping alone one Saturday, two teen girls stood in front of me at the checkout counter with a giant bottle of chocolate syrup. The only thing I said as I slipped several dollars to the cashier on their behalf was “God Bless you” to the two smiling young faces. It ended up being on sale and just one dollar, but it was my small way of demonstrating God’s love toward others, and God lifted my spirits as I gave just a little away, my unexpected blessing from Him.

A young mom from our neighborhood texted me to see if she could pick up some food for her three small children from our churches pantry. I could not get there, but the owner of the preschool was there to help, and helped her carry the groceries to her car where she quietly handed the young mom an envelope with extra cash.  That mom called me later to say how she could not believe how God had met her need so quickly.  Sometimes our random acts of kindness are really divine appointments– God’s way of letting others know they are loved and not forgotten.

Feeling Sad?

Be the hand of God.

 

Healing – Part 4

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Yesterday I fell off my bike carrying too much on the way home from our mailbox. It was a pretty hard fall, contents of my basket flying everywhere, and blood dripping from scrapes on my wrist and leg as I rode home.

Photo by Trish Southard

Photo by Trish Southard

Share your load with others.

Todd would have been glad to swing by our box and pick up some of the bigger items on his way home from work.

Our family lost three loved ones in four years.

Multiple loved ones passing away or one is too much of a burden for anyone to bear alone.

Grief Group helped me lift my heavy heart.

Surrounded by people who have suffered the loss of a loved one, and a leader, the group gently persuades you to share your imperfect memories, portraits,  all while putting you at ease.

Our leader had us write letters to our loved ones sharing that we wished they would have remained alive longer, our anger that they missed an important event, regrets, anger and how lonely we feel without them. We then read those letters at the cemetery or somewhere significant to the two of us. We then burned or buried the letters.

Somehow I felt lighter and more at ease with each letter.

In the Jewish faith when a loved one dies, they sit Shiva for seven days.

They stay home and allow others to listen to them, care for them, and bring them food.

When others are in pain, you will find yourself more compassionate and confident to walk through it with them.

Sit beside them quietly.

No advice needed.

When others are happy, be happy with them.

If they are sad, share their sorrow.

Romans 12:15 TLB

Healing – Part 3

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A Holly Hobby stitching gently nudged my thoughts as I passed it each day.

Whenever you’re blue

Find something to do

For somebody else

Who is sadder than you

 

Blood Moon Photo by Colleen Lienhard

Blood Moon
Photo by Colleen Lienhard

 

Fill your friends’ and families’ darkness with God’s spectacular paint brush.

Stopping off in Columbia to see Uncle Tom and Aunt Grace is always a powerful time of prayer.  Celebrating their 51st wedding anniversary they are blessed by God. Grace stayed up till 1 am with me, and we prayed big and bold and color-filled blessings and prayers on everyone in our families.

Praying the Word of God over each one individually.

At the beach we sunned and swam every day, just the three of us, and occasionally Rick and Laura after work at Corolla Chapel.

I missed the family that had sat beside me the 27 previous years –with our Lord, or off to college, college bound and others spending their vacation elsewhere.

North Carolina was our state.  My husband born in Chapel Hill, our daughter’s summers here at her grandparents’ beach house and my summers for 27 years.

Refreshed by salt air and my family’s laughter and constant teasing, God comforted me.

Fresh sun, vivid oranges and blue streaked memories.

We played new games and visited different spots rediscovering the Outer Banks.

I checked out of email, FB, text and all the rest.

The spaciousness of the ocean and expansion of my time with my family turned my attention upward Praising God and lifting everyone, many of you who are deeply hurting in intercession to our Lord.  I am certain He is going to change your situation or your struggle.

Have faith and believe.

Look up and enjoy His favor and blessing.